And it begins…

“Josh, what is “maly” of maly.janicek.com?”

I have fairly self-explanatory subdomains under Janicek.com such as cabo.janicek.com, cooking.janicek.com and photos.janicek.com.

I wanted a new, secret subdomain to blog our pregnancy until we tell the world. I thought about baby.janicek.com and little.janicek.com. I decided to consult Google to find a word for “small” or “little” in Czech. I came across the word “maly” in the Little Czech Primer.

I don’t know how to pronounce “maly” in Czech. I’m fairly certain it would be pronounced something like, “paperweight” or “jockstrap” in the motherland. I pronounce it “Maylee”. That doesn’t mean we’re naming our child “Maly”. I do think that would be a cute name for a girl. Not so much for a boy though. Maybe “Jockstrap”.

That being said, the name Janicek is, in fact, Czech. My great grandmother was from what was previously known as Czechoslovakia. Unfortunately I don’t know much about my partial heritage other than she shares the same last name and kolaches taste pretty damn good.

Last week Elise and I caught up on all of Dan and Kerry’s Baby Time Podcasts to date. I found their Podcast in the iTunes Music Store last Sunday and we’ve really enjoyed getting a glimpse into the lives of a pregnant couple who are almost three months ahead of us. I say almost three months because I don’t know how to translate that into weeks pregnant. I still don’t think I know what “fallopian tubes” are or “Daylight Savings Time”, for that matter.

Last night’s episode #10, week 18 was the episode where the couple were going to find out the sex of the baby. Earlier in the afternoon Dan and Kerry had an ultrasound. The radiologist and ultrasound technician concurred that they were 98% certain the sex of the baby.

Elise and I sat on the couch and listened to the entire show in anticipation. The scenario was not much unlike what I imagine our parents and grandparents did in their days; sitting together in the living room, looking at the walls or one another and listening intently to the program on the radio. There was no fancy picture tube to entertain our eyes. We had to use our primitive and God-given imaginations as we quietly listened to the old radio technology that was being streamed at 54 Mbps via a 802.11g wireless card on a 2.4GHz frequency from my iBook to the Airport Express and out through 5.1 Dolby Digital surround sound. You know, old technology.

The climax was approaching 20 minutes into the new episode. We were about to find out if Dan and Kerry were having a boy or a girl!

Kerry said, “Well, it’s about time…” Meaning they were about to open the sealed envelope from the ultrasound.

Dan interjected and said, “Hang on, I had one more thing. Josh and Elise are listening down in Austin and had a wonderful review posted on their blog - they’re expecting too…”

Elise and were already smiling as we both sat on the couch because we were anticipating first-ever Podcast news of a boy or a girl. We kept smiling and were both thinking, “Hey, there’s another Josh and Elise in Austin and they’re ALSO going to…”

“Hey!… they’re talking about us.”

It was so funny. We were totally caught off guard and dumbfounded.

After the shock we listened in to find out that Dan and Kerry are having a baby boy!

Congratulations, Dan and Kerry.

You can subscribe to the Baby Time Podcast here. You can listen to “The Results Are In!” here (Elise and I are mentioned at the 21 minute mark)

I wanted to use the baby image from “2001: A Space Odyssey”, but couldn’t find a good photo (or one that wasn’t too freaky). I found this photo while searching Google for images and after a little Photoshop fun…

The Inspiration

The Idea

The Joining

The Banner

In my next life I’m thinking of being a Photoshop Fertilization Artist… Or would that just be considered porn?

I don’t know how many times this has happened since we found out that Elise is pregnant…

Throughout the course of the day I’ll check my personal e-mail a few times and take micro breaks. Recently my personal business has been leaning heavily towards pregnancy and baby research on the web.

It is at this point in the day when someone comes rushing to me behind my desk, “Josh, can you sign this check?”, “Josh, does the text on this poster look centered?”, “Josh, where is this on the network?”

I’ve mastered the Alt + Tab so I can quickly switch to an open application that doesn’t make it seem as if I’m determining my last menstrual period.

As whoever is standing over my shoulder I too often glance at my monitor to see if there is any incriminating evidence. I usually find my task bar with fairly simple clues:

Luckily I haven’t been caught because believe me, I’d know it. I work in an office comprised of all women.

It’s not that this is our bad little secret - we’ve decided we’re going to wait until after the first trimester before telling anyone. I need to learn to be a little more careful.

This is our pregnancy calendar according to pregnancy.about.com:

Elise and I went over to our friend Tommy’s house last night to check out his newly purchased first home. We were in kind of a rush so Elise decided to slap a bologna sandwich together for dinner. I saw her building her sandwich so I decided a sandwich sounded good. I toasted some white bread, slathered the toast with mayo and diced up a leftover ribeye for a hearty steak sandwich. Elise looked at my sandwich. She looked at her sandwich.

“Awwwww… I wanted a steak sandwich.”

The manly dad-to-be handed over his hearty steak sandwich in exchange for a bologna sandwich - no questions asked.

I’m glad I gave Elise my sandwich. Apparently bologna can harbor the bacterium Listeria.

And all this time I thought Listeria was one of Def Leppard’s top-selling albums.

On my regular website I recently posted about Podcasts. Up until last night I couldn’t find a Podcast that I could wrap my brain around. I subscribed to quite a few only to listen to them long enough to realize that they just couldn’t hold my interest. I’ve subscribed to things that I’m interested in: Cooking, wine, sports, humor, technology and the like. Most have been subjected to the Unsubscribe button in iTunes.

Last night we found Dan and Kerry Gorgone’s Baby Time Podcast. We listened to their first show and became fans immediately. Baby Time is a very well produced Podcast and it is informative and entertaining to boot! Dan and Kerry are first time expectant parents and are documenting the pregnancy in a very unique way. Dan is admirable in his accepting of the supportive role he will be taking as well as his thirst for knowledge of the pregnancy. He sort of runs the show and asks Kerry a lot of questions pertaining to how she is feeling, how she’s sleeping, food aversions and cravings, clothing, their workplaces, whispers and the rumor mill and life in general for the expectant mom in the early stages.

Again, this Podcast is well produced. The audio levels are perfect - just like a standard radio talk show. The parents-to-be are educated, intelligent and witty. They speak clearly and make for a very enjoyable program. They also get to the meat and potatoes of their pregnancy and lives together. There’s no droning on about inconsequential topics or issues unrelated to the topic at hand.

What I think is really cool about the Baby Time Podcast is how the couple ends their weekly show: Dan says, “And now the baby is?…” to which Kerry responds, “The size of a raspberry!”

If you’re expecting, definitely subscribe to the Baby Time Podcast. Even if you’re not expecting, it’s still a light-hearted and fun show to listen to that leaves you wanting more and anxiously awaiting the next episode.

Click to enlarge

To subscribe to Podcasts:

Download iTunes for free from Apple’s website.

Once installed, click the “Podcasts” link in the left-side navigation. You will then be taken to the iTunes Music Store where you can browse and search for all Podcasts that are offered. You can sample Podcasts before subscribing. And subscribing is as simple as a click. Click the “Subscribe” button and your Podcast will immediately download to the Podcast section of your iTunes library. From there you can make changes to your Podcast preferences by clicking Edit > Preferences and then clicking the Podcasts tab.

iTunes is available for Windows PCs and Macintosh computers. You don’t need an iPod to listen to Podcasts - you can listen to them on your desktop PC.

Today marks the begining of week 6. I think. I don’t know. Elise is more in tune with the whole timing thing. I’m sure I’ll become more cognizant of weeks and trimesters in the weeks and trimesters to come.

From what I’ve gathered, the baby should be between 7-9 mm and the genital tubercle is present. Genital Tubercle would be a good name for a band.

I’m getting more and more excited but thus far have heeded the ignorance is bliss mantra. I know nature will run its course and we will learn more as we progress. Again, Elise is tuned in to what is going on and his been keeping up to date on research. I’ve been scratching my butt and grunting a lot more these days. I think it’s the hormones.

Since we’re so early into the pregnancy there’s not a whole lot to report on. Elise babysat Jack on Tuesday night. Christine and Cyndi went to some sort of class on begining and maintaining family traditions. When Christine returned she gave Elise a couple books and a really nice, handmade congratulations card. So now we have books. I will read these books in the week to come. I think that will help me in understanding what Elise and the baby will be going through in these critical months.

In other pregnancy-related news: I’ve been lively. I hop out of bed in the mornings with full intent. I’m somewhat invigorated. In the past I’ve always been good about getting up in the mornings, but a lot of times I’d drag ass. Now I’m up and immediately ready to take on some sort of challenge. Right now my challenges are limited to finding the toothpaste and not accidentally stepping on the cat. The dad instinct has been implanted.

This morning was welcomed with my now-typical lively wake up. I got ready for work and walked into the bedroom to get my shoes before leaving for the office. I stopped in the doorway and looked at Elise while she slept. She had that glow. I reveled in that moment. She looked beautiful. It’s hard to explain that glow. I guess that’s one of the joys and privileges of being an expectant father - you get to see and experience that glow.

I got home from work at a normal hour last night. I decided I needed some exercise. I ran into the house, changed clothes, put my effects away, grabbed the iPod and was off to get my bike and head out the door. Elise walked in from work just as I was getting ready to leave. I thought she would be working most of the night.

I turned around in the dining room and we walked back into the house. She looked exhausted. We talked for a bit. She sat at the bar, put her head down and nearly fell asleep there. We decided we would go for a walk together after it cooled off outside. I decided to go for a bike ride anyway and Elise went to take a nap.

The ride was nice. I rode for 45 minutes, got the ticker beating and worked up a good sweat. I came home, watered the lawn and paid off some debt. Elise woke up and we then went for a nice walk around the neighborhood.

We passed a lady who was walking with her young son on his bicycle. She was also pushing her other child in a stroller. So Elise and I talked about strollers and things of that nature. I inspected the neighborhood St. Augustine lawns, we looked at houses for landscaping ideas and we just talked and walked.

It was a nice walk. I’m going to make it a point to make us walk together as Elise’s work schedule permits.

I was in the den, watching the Texans and Raiders pre-season game last night. Elise was sitting next to me on the couch, absorbing more pregnancy and childbirth information from places like BabyCenter.com and About.com. Mom came into the den and the girls started gabbing. I tuned them out for the most part. And then they started in on the astrology. My mom has always had an interest in astrology and peoples’ signs. It’s an innocent hobby. I didn’t inheret that gene and pretty much think it’s quackery. Elise likes to endulge in this astrological thinking. So they were gabbing about what Elise’s and my signs are and how we’re earth or fire signs and that our baby is going to be a libra, librarian, liger, libertarian - something, I don’t know, I was trying to watch the football game. They got excited and started laughing and getting giddy. I turned to them both and said, “You two are nuts!”

I continued to tune them out. I’m sure they have our first-born’s life all figured out now.